Happy Ho Rules

Happy Ho Rules

I work as a hooker down on my knees sucking cocks, or being fucked, but I don’t feel as if I am out of control. If anything, when I have some man’s precious member in my mouth, he would do well to remember the dynamic. I have teeth in said mouth and aren’t afraid to use them if need be. Thankfully it has never come to that. I don’t feel down trodden, or bad about myself. I mean good grief what other jobs pays me xxx per hour, allows me to have free time when I want it, and a lifestyle most envy.

You see, I don’t feel as if they are doing me a favor, I am doing them one, and this is generally how I engage with clients. Say, ‘please’, and ‘thank you’. Most hookers after a time feel sad about the work they have done, come to regret it, and in some cases spend years after trying to recover their once sweet innocent selves from the wreckage of the person they are now. This could be because so many start at a young age when they are still developing, and this will and does cause serious damage. I was a lot older, and determined to write the script to my way of seeing the world. I have met women who have horrific stories to tell about working in the sex industry, and there is a part of me that cringes in horror to hear that a human being has had to suffer this type of debased cruelty. But I honestly have no such horror stories to share. I have never been pimped, pimps have tried, I see them coming a mile off. The tactics are so obvious, it is baffling to me how they manage to get anyone to fall for their tired old lines. I am certainly not trafficked, the very idea is as ridiculous as me being pimped. I am usually the one committing acts of violence against my clients, at their request and for a hell of a lot more than what I get paid for shagging them. And amazingly enough there are a few, a tiny few, I will get to know as people and actually come to like. These of course are all exceptions to the rules I made for myself when I first started working.

The happy ho rules for a peaceful existence and smooth transactions:

1. Money first. No matter how long you know someone, business first out of the way. No exceptions.

2. A client is a client, he isn’t my friend, he isn’t boyfriend material, he isn’t someone to share personal information with, he is a client. Now like any rule there are exceptions, and I do have a few examples, of this. But I can honestly count them on one hand.

3.Time is money. 5 mins over time or even 10, but not an hour or more! I am a hooker, not a social worker.

4. Condoms always! If a long term client tries to even mention sex without, he will NEVER be admitted to my door again.

5. No personal information. This is why I like working in rented apartments or hotels. Nothing personal left laying around.

6. I am in charge. I am the boss, I make the rules.

7. Have security measures in place.

8. Listen to your gut. If that little voice is telling you something is not right. Trust it without question.

9. If I don’t feel like working, don’t.

10. Never break one of my rules.

Now, being human and a female, I have broken some of my rules, and was reminded why I have them in the first place.

Rule 1, broke it a few time with not problems, broke it one time when tired, and guess what. The client never returned.

Rule 3, late appointment, let the person sit and chat for a bit, he seemed to think that this would be a normal part of the appointments from now on. Lost a client.

Rule 8, didn’t listen, and the idiot came in behaved like an ass, I threw him out and the bastard had me and my friend thrown out of our hotels.

Rule 9, the day you don’t feel like working, you will get the dregs of the barrel in terms of clients. Better to stay in bed. A luxury I like having.

Now how many jobs can you do that allows you to take a mental health day or a week if need be? Thought so.

3 thoughts on “Happy Ho Rules

  1. I’m thinking that most of your rules could be remembered for web cam models too. I’d be an escort if I didn’t have a hubby to consider….so I have chosen to get into web caming instead.

  2. Just musing, reading this, but it seem to me that, perhaps, most women are not ready to be a professional hooker until the age at which most retire from the business?

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